Virtue | # |
Empathy | 1 |
Helpfulness | 2 |
Fairness | 3 |
Tolerance | 4 |
Caring | 5 |
Courage | 6 |
Humor | 7 |
Respect | 8 |
Loyal | 9 |
ave you ever put a book on a shelf and forgot about? This is exactly what I did with 20 Teachable Virtues: Practical Ways to Pass on Lessons of Virtue and Character to Your Children by Barbara C. Unell and Jerry L. Wyckoff. I was given the book when I was at Sacred Heart by the Dad’s Prayer Group. Once a month a group of dads both young and old would gather to pray and talk about the blessings and challenges of being a dad in the world today. In addition to their prayer and reflection a member would present one of the virtues found in this book. When I moved from Sacred Heart to St. Norbert, I packed it away and forgot about it until a couple of weeks ago when I opened a box and found it. I thought to myself since the month of November in the Church makes us thinks about saints and the life we want to live that this would be a good book to reflect on this month. I pray that you will find some of my reflections helpful in your daily journey toward heaven.
Empathy
The first virtue that Unell and Wyckoff choose to write about is Empathy. What is Empathy? Empathy is more than just listening even though listening plays a major role in being empathetic. Here is their definition:
Em-pa-thyn.1. The imaginative projection of a subjective state into an object so that the object appears to be infused with it 2. The capacity for participating in another’s feelings or ideas.
Empathy to me is the ability to stop and try to understand how someone else is feeling. I am practicing empathy when someone comes to me and tells me a story about how someone has hurt them and I imagine what it must have been like to be the person being hurt. When I am using empathy, I can be more caring and compassionate toward others because I can imagine myself in the role of the other person.
Empathy requires active listening skills which means that I have to focus on the person talking to me and not be thinking of the next thing I am going to say and I must also be aware of that person’s body language. If a person tells me they are doing fine and they are on the verge of tears and I believe them then most likely I have just failed a test of empathy.
One of the best ways to be empathetic is to ask open ended questions (questions that cannot simply be answered with a “yes” or “no” answer) and allow the person to express their feelings. Another good way to practice empathy is try to remember a similar experience that you may have had and what emotions accompanied that experience. We must be careful though not to assume that these experiences are equal but rather our past experiences help us get into the ballpark of what someone else is feeling.
It is important to teach children (and ourselves) empathy because “they (us) need to learn behaviors that show empathy in order to help them live in peace with their neighbors, get along with their coworkers on the job, and enjoy relationships with friends and family. In fact, empathy is the rock-solid foundation for almost every brick used in building solid citizens of today and tomorrow. Empathy is the cement that holds together the secret formula for constructing caring and compassionate human beings, and it is as essential for survival as air and water.”
10 Steps: To Help One Develop the Virtue of Empathy
1. I can practice listening. Listening is more than just hearing sounds and noises. Listening involves hearing the ideas that are being expressed through both words and body language. Too often we can find ourselves instead of not listening focusing on what we are going to say next.
2. I can pay better attention to body language. Most of what we communicate to people is not through spoken words but rather through our facial expressions and body movements. If I tell people that I am “fine” and I am ready to cry then I am obviously not fine.
3. When listening to the person, try to imagine yourself in that persons place and how you would feel if the events that he or she is describing happened to you.
4. Ask yourself why do you think the person is telling this story to you and what would you want someone to do for you if it you were in that situation.
5. Rephrase what the person is saying and repeat it back to them so that they can clarify their thoughts: “What I hear you saying is…?
6. Acknowledge their emotions in a way that allows them to know that emotions are not good or bad but what we do with them can be. “I understand that you are angry Johnny but you still have no right to hit your sister,” is a good example of a statement that acknowledges the person’s emotions but also lets the person know that the following action was not appropriate.
7. Do be quick to give advice. Sometimes we can be so quick to give advice that we do not listen to what the person is saying.
8. Be careful of story matching. You may have a great story that “tops” the story the person just told you but sometimes the other person is just looking for someone to listen to them.
9. When you have hurt someone try to play things over in your head and ask yourself what is that you did to hurt the person or how would you have felt if things were reversed.
10. Lastly pray with the person. Allow the person know that you are with them and that you want to offer their
The month of November begins with the great feast days of All Saints and All Souls Days and ends with the feasts of Christ the King and the beginning of Advent. This time of year our Church readings inspire us to think about whether or not we will be ready when our Lord comes again and will be worthy of heaven. As Catholics we believe that the answers to those two questions depend a lot on how we live our daily lives and how we treat others which one may call in philosophical language ethics. As Catholics we believe in a virtue ethic in which we are called constantly to improve ourselves. So continuing this month’s reflections on virtue with the help of Barbara C. Unell and Jerry L. Wyckoff’s book: 20 Teachable Virtues: Practical Ways to Pass on Lessons of Virtue and Character to Your Children.
Helpfulness
Our next virtue is the virtue of helpfulness. What exactly do we mean by the word “helpfulness”? This is Unell’s and Wyckoff’s definition of helpfulness:
Helpvb. 1.To contribute strength or means to; render assistance to; cooperate effectively with; aid; assist 2.To give aid be of service or advantage.
We have all known people who talk a big game about being helpful but while they are talking about being helpful or what a big help they are someone else is actually doing the real work. There is a part of each of us that really wants to be a helpful person because we like the idea of being needed by another person but this does not mean that have or practice the virtue of helpfulness. The person who is willing to help when there is no glory, no credit, no fame to be gained is a person who has learned the virtue of helpfulness. I know that I have been blessed in all my parish assignments to truly have helpful people.
One of the most important things about being truly helpful is learning to be selfless in our thoughts and actions. Truly helpful people give without counting the cost. They are motivated truly out of a love and respect for others and a notion often inspired by faith that this is what God wants us to do—help one another. We are to be the Good Samaritans of today.
It is also important to remember that being helpful requires a sacrifice on your part and that God is never out done in generosity.
10 Steps: To Help One Develop the Virtue of Helpfulness
1. Using your empathy skills ask yourself how I would feel if I was in need of help.
2. Find a way to care about the other person. We are more incline to be helpful when we care about the other person even if is as minimal as I care for the person because he or she is a fellow human being.
3. Practice doing things that you know need to be done with being asked to.
4. Find truly helpful people and see how they live their life. I am pretty sure the joy you see in them will inspire you to be more helpful.
5. Make sure you know the differences between needs and wants in your own life. Often we don’t volunteer because we are afraid to give up some small creature comfort. If we remind ourselves of the differences between needs and want then we will more likely be helpful.
6. Try being the friend (or helpful person) you would want others to be.
7. Remember that being helpful often strengthens relationships
8. Try to be grateful to those who have helped you.
9. Admit our own need for weaknesses and that other people are not competition but rather have strengths that you may need and they may need your strengths because of their weaknesses.
10. Look for the odd task or the hardest task and try to be the first to do it - knowing that this is following the example of Christ who washed the feet of His disciples while they were all arguing about who the greatest one was.
As we continue our look at some of the different virtues that we should be striving to develop so that we can become the people God wants us to be (in other words living saints) with the help of the book written by Barbara C. Unell and Jerry L. Wyckoff’s called 20 Teachable Virtues: Practical Ways to Pass on Lessons of Virtue and Character to Your Children.
Fairness
This next virtue of fairness I believe is often misunderstood because most people assume that fairness means treating each person equally but this is not always the case. I think that Barbara’s and Jerry’s definition of fairness can be interpreted that way.
Fairn.1.Free from bias, dishonesty, or injustice 2.Legitately sought, pursued, done, given, etc.; proper under the rules.
While this sounds like a great definition at first glance there is something wrong with it because we are all not created the same. If I was playing tennis against a professional tennis star there would be nothing fair about the game and I would end up being creamed. I can remember watching a video in the seminary that was meant to help us understand children with learning disabilities. The instructor on the video gave what I think is a better definition of fairness: “fairness is giving each person what he or she needs to succeed. The video went on to show a scene where the instructor showed the studio audience a picture and he asked them what they thought the picture was a picture of. One man said it looked like a skull (and to be honest that was my first impression of the picture sitting in my chair watching it on television). The instructor then went off on the man calling him dumb and stupid because he saw something ugly (the skull) when he should have saw a woman in a beautiful dress. As soon as the man said that it was a picture of a woman in a beautiful dress I saw that the woman in the picture too. The instructor went onto say that often people with learning disabilities are yelled at and called dumb because they do not always see what everyone else sees because their imagination and mind are going off in many directions at once. Equality demands that the child should answer like everyone else without any help but fairness calls us to help the child to discover tools that will help him or her focus.
Fairness can only exist though when we see other peoples as friends or at least potential friends and not competition. If we are in a spirit of competition then we will be looking for every possible advantage over others and we will have no desire to be fair with them.
10 Steps: To Help One Develop the Virtue of Fairness
1. Remember that you are love and that you are special. So many times when we treat others badly it is because we are worried about being love. We know that God loves us then we will treat others better.
2. Allow someone to beat you. I am not saying give up but take the time to play with a child (5 to 6 years old) and allow them to beat you at something you are good at even if you have to help them a lot so that they can beat you.
3. Try something that you are not good at and allow others to help you get better at it. You can learn to help others through their examples.
4. Help someone else who is in need of help
5. Count your blessings and remember that everything you have is a gift from God.
6. Write someone a thank you note for helping you when you needed help
7. Show concern for the welfare of others by making a donation of time or money to an organization that helps the poor.
8. Try to do something someone else’s way instead of forcing others to do things your way.
9. Remember that winning is not everything
10. Take time to tutor someone in a subject that you are good at.
We have come to our last Sunday of November and the first Sunday of Advent. Where has the year gone? Let us continue our look at some of the different virtues that we should develop in order to be a better person with the help of the book written by Barbara C. Unell and Jerry L. Wyckoff’s called 20 Teachable Virtues: Practical Ways to Pass on Lessons of Virtue and Character to Your Children.
Tolerance
If there is one virtue that our society proclaims loud and clear it is the virtue of tolerance but often what they call tolerance is anything but. Where true tolerance promotes learning and understanding of those who are different the false tolerance preached by our society declares that tolerance means that we should never have to be faced with those differences. They have turned tolerance into a promotion of same-ness which is not a virtue because if God wanted us all to be the same He would have made us that way. Instead God made us very diverse so that we can see real beauty. Here is Barbara’s and Jerry’s definition of Tolerance:
Tol-er-ance n. 1. A fair and objective attitude toward those who opinions, practices, race, religion, nationality, or the like differ from one’s own; freedom from bigotry 2. Any liberal, undogmatic viewpoint 3. The act of capacity of enduring; endurance.
I like to think of tolerance in the terms of an analogy with art. While there can be very beautiful mono-colored pieces of art for there to be true vibrancy in life there needs to be more than one color so that we can compare and contrast so that we can see a difference in how the light reflects off the art etc. The human race is like a giant mosaic and it is our differences that allow us to truly be God’s masterpiece.
People though today want to erase all our differences for example school prayer. There are many who proclaim in the name of tolerance that there should be no prayer time in public schools. This is not tolerance in my opinion but rather discrimination. True tolerance would find opportunities for each culture, religion, etc to express its form of prayer in a way that others could learn about it. I know that I have come to a greater reverence for the Jewish faith by participating/attending a Seder meal and a Bar Mitzvah.
A while ago I was talking with someone who was not a Catholic and who did not understand why we would not allow her to receive Communion. I explained to her that tolerance is not caving in and giving up any our beliefs for others to feel comfortable and I used the analogy if she was to invite me over to her house she would be hospitable by allowing me to come into her house but there are certain parts of her house that are more intimate to her than others. Even though she would have invited me over to her house she would not want me going through her medicine cabinets or her clothes drawers. In much the same way we hold the Eucharist as something that is so intimate to us as Catholics that we cannot just give it away. I also went on with my analogy to state how each of my brothers and sisters who have their own houses have different levels of comfort when I am there. My one brother is fine with me leaving an empty soda can on the kitchen counter but one of my sisters would have a cow if I did that at her house. Being a good guess dictates that I make an effort to be tolerant of my host’s desires also. I therefore do not place empty soda cans on my sister’s counter when I am her house. Tolerance therefore demands respect for both people involved.
10 Steps: To Help One Develop the Virtue of Tolerance
1. Talk to people. It is interesting the director of the Transformers movies stated in an interview that he tried to keep the evil robot’s dialogue to a minimum because the more we hear someone talk the less scary and evil they seem to us.
2. If you find a particular race, ethnicity, culture, religion etc. scary take some time to read and study about them. A class or book on world religion can be a great way of doing it.
3. Do not lump people into one group or at least allow for diversity among members of that group. Think of how many different types of Catholics there are.
4. Try to do some sort of service with a person that is different from you. Nothing brings people together then working with each other to help others.
5. Assume the best in others. List two or three great qualities of people who are different then you
6. Know the true meaning of tolerance.
7. Acknowledge our own sinfulness and ask God’s for the grace to overcome some of our hidden prejudices.
8. Try to understand the position of another person and appreciate that person’s history that lead to their point of view.
9. Try to compromise on things and leave the “my way or the highway” mentality behind.
10. Take time to learn your own reasoning and beliefs.
As Catholics we believe in what is known as a “Virtue Ethic” which means that we believe that all human beings are called to develop into better human beings by creating good habits. We are all morally like athletes in as much as an athlete is called to develop good habits of diet, exercise, and sportsmanship, we are called to develop our consciences and moral habits so that we can be the morally upstanding people God is calling us to be.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church says the following about virtues in general:
"Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things."
A virtue is an habitual and firm disposition to do the good. It allows the person not only to perform good acts, but to give the best of himself. The virtuous person tends toward the good with all his sensory and spiritual powers; he pursues the good and chooses it in concrete actions.
The goal of a virtuous life is to become like God. (CCC1803)
Last November, I started to take each Sunday in November to talk about a different virtue with the help of a book written by Barbara C. Unell and Jerry L. Wyckoff’s called 20 Teachable Virtues: Practical Ways to Pass on Lessons of Virtue and Character to Your Children.
Caring
This Sunday I would like to focus on the virtue of Caring. So what does it meant to be “caring”? Unell and Wyckoff’s definition is below in bold:
Caring vb. 1. To feel interest or concern 2. To give care (for the sick) n. 1. A sense of responsibility 2. Painstaking or watchful attention 3. Regard coming from desire or esteem.
Caring is an odd virtue because it is fueled by one’s soul. Caring is a lot like music, dance, or art in that there is something more than reason that motivates one to being a caring person. It is also mystical in the fact that it cannot simply be taught but it must also be modeled. A young person must experience and witness another person being caring if he or she wished to be caring. Caring is also a great virtue to develop because it invokes an almost immediate reward of good feedback and rewards. Early in the development of the virtue of caring it is important that the person learning caring receives positive feedback. To be a caring person, one develops the ability to think about the needs and feelings of others.
10 Steps to Help Develop the Virtue of Caring:
1. Make sure to reinforce the idea that our behaviors affect others. When we realize that we can have a positive or negative effect on others we will strive hard naturally to avoid hurting others.
2. It is important to have the virtue of caring modeled for us since it is an abstract concept.
3. When teaching others about caring it is important to do so in a caring way and not a demeaning way.
4. When correcting others make sure to explain what it is that they did wrong or how you expected them to behave. Simple do not tell them “to behave.”
5. Take a moment, if you see uncaring activities on television or movies, to think about what the caring act would have been.
6. When watching children play make sure to correct uncaring behavior. It is often better to suggest alternative ways of acting instead of lecturing.
7. Perform caring activities with others like going to a soup kitchen with a parish group.
8. Remember to give positive feedback often when you see people being caring
9. Focus on being empathetic to others needs and not our own.
10. Focus on wanting what is best for the other person.
Last Sunday I looked at the virtue of Caring and this Sunday I wish to look at the virtue of courage. Before I dive deeper into the idea of the virtue of courage I wish to share with you another passage from the Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC) about virtue.
Human virtues are firm attitudes, stable dispositions, habitual perfections of intellect and will that govern our actions, order our passions, and guide our conduct according to reason and faith. They make possible ease, self-mastery, and joy in leading a morally good life. The virtuous man is he who freely practices the good.
The moral virtues are acquired by human effort. They are the fruit and seed of morally good acts; they dispose all the powers of the human being for communion with divine love. (CCC1804)
Courage
I have always like the quote: “There is a fine line between courage and stupidity.” I think therefore that is important that we define exactly what we mean by the word “courage”. Unell and Wyckoff’s definition is below in bold:
Courage n. 1. The quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., with firmness and without fear; bravery. Syn. Fearlessness, dauntlessness, intrepidity, fortitude, pluck, spirit. Have the courage of one’s conviction vb. To act in accordance with one’s belief, esp. in spite of criticism.
Courage in its basic form is standing up against something that can or does create the feeling of fear in us. Often this fear is brought to us by peer pressure. To teach people courage means that we are teaching them to take reasonable risks, admitting mistakes, and to stand up for one’s belief. It is important to realize that courage does not mean trying to do the impossible. There is a need to be rational while being courageous otherwise it is not courage but stupidity one exercises. The second thing is to have the courage to admit that we have made mistakes and then to learn from them. Finally one demonstrates courage by standing up for one’s belief as Edmund Burke put it “The only thing necessary for the triumph (of evil) is for good men to do nothing.”
10 Steps to Help Develop the Virtue of Courage:
1. First try to model courage to others or look for others who are courageous to model courage to you.
2. Examine the role of peer pressure in your life and what is it that you fear?
3. Identify your fears and examine them to see if they are rational
4. Teach children to stand up for their rights and the rights of others.
5. “Discretion is the better part of valor.” It is important to realize that one does not have to win every battle.
6. Never assume another person should just get over their fears but rather help them develop courage.
7. Read Scripture passages about God’s faithfulness and love for us.
8. Do not climb to the top of a diving board and throw someone who is afraid of water into deep end of the pool. This will most likely result in them developing a lack of trust in you.
9. Look for examples of small ways to help in cultural situations. Reaching out to a homeless person.
10. Talk to others about your pressure and fears with others.
We have looked at the virtues of caring and courage and so now we move onto the next virtue which is humor. Before we move to this virtue let us look at another passage from the Catechism of the Catholic Church:
Human virtues acquired by education, by deliberate acts and by a perseverance ever-renewed in repeated efforts are purified and elevated by divine grace. With God's help, they forge character and give facility in the practice of the good. The virtuous man is happy to practice them. (CCC 1810)
It is not easy for man, wounded by sin, to maintain moral balance. Christ's gift of salvation offers us the grace necessary to persevere in the pursuit of the virtues. Everyone should always ask for this grace of light and strength, frequent the sacraments, cooperate with the Holy Spirit, and follow his calls to love what is good and shun evil. (CCC 1811)
Humor, may not be consider by some to be a virtue but being able to laugh with others even in the midst of trouble and chaos.
Humor n 1. A comic quality causing amusement: the humor of a situation. 2. The faculty of perceiving, appreciating, or expressing what is amusing or comical. 3. Comical writing or talk in general. 4. Mental disposition or temperament. 5. A temporary mood or frame of mind: He’s in a bad humor today. 6. A capricious or freakish inclination; whim or caprice; odd trait.
According to Unell and Wyckoff’s book: “Humor evokes a uniquely human emotional response. Babies are able to laugh with joy at moments of discovery, simply bubbling over with surprise of their growing awareness. But children can lose the virtue of humor when they feel unloved and when their lives lack models of how to flavor life with a sense of humor. To be able to see the humor in life requires an appreciation of its spontaneity and its imperfections. This appreciation is best developed in the context of a caring and supportive environment that encourages feeling a joyful sense of wonder about the world and looking for humor and solutions in adversity rather than looking for someone else to blame or to be responsible for life’s ups and downs.”
When talking about humor I think it is important to remind ourselves that the virtue is always in the middle of two vices. If we have no sense of humor then we can take ourselves, our lives and others too seriously and if we have too much humor in our life we can become sarcastic and insensitive. Another problem with humor is that we often have to judge the effects of our humor on other people. Sometimes a joke that one person finds harmless another person takes too seriously.
10 Steps to Help Develop the Virtue of Humor:
1. One must model humor without laughing at the person you are modeling the virtue of humor to.
2. Remember that it is alright to be imperfect with humor as long as you are willing to apologize when someone does not take your joke in the way that you intended.
3. Remember that no one is perfect
4. Laugh at children’s jokes or attempts at humor.
5. Make sure your humor is not direct at other peoples faults.
6. If children tell you an inappropriate joke do not overreact but rather explain to them why what they said was wrong. Remember that children are most likely repeating something that they had heard.
7. Remind people to be concerned about other people.
8. Remember to avoid fighting fire with fire.
9. Remember that God loves everyone
10. Remember to laugh a lot.
We are now here for the final Sunday of the month and we are now ready to look at the virtue of respect. Here though is two more passages from the Catechism of the Catholic Church:
The moral life of Christians is sustained by the gifts of the Holy Spirit. These are permanent dispositions which make man docile in following the promptings of the Holy Spirit. (CCC 1830)
Virtue is a habitual and firm disposition to do good. (CCC 1833)
Our last virtue for the month is respect. So let us see what Barbara (Unell) and Jerry (Wyckoff) have to tell us about the definition of the virtue of respect.
Respect vb. To consider worthy of high regard: ESTEEM n. 1. The quality or state of being esteemed: HONOR 2. Expressions of respect or deference.
Respect means caring about others even if it means an infringement of one’s own right. Often respect comes from thinking positive about others. A lot of respect comes from living the Golden rule: do onto others as you would have them do unto you. Wikipedia had the following to say about the Golden Rule: “The Golden Rule is arguably the most essential basis for the modern concept of human rights, in which each individual has a right to just treatment, and a reciprocal responsibility to ensure justice for others. A key element of the Golden Rule is that a person attempting to live by this rule treats all people with consideration, not just members of his or her in-group. The Golden Rule has its roots in a wide range of world cultures, and is a standard different cultures use to resolve conflicts.”
10 Steps to Help Develop the Virtue of Respect:
1. Remember the best way to model respect is to remember that each person is a gift from God.
2. Remember to try to think of most people in positive terms.
3. Remember to see other people’s problems as important to them
4. Remember not to attack other’s people characters.
5. Make sure to praise kind and caring acts.
6. Remember that a key way to show respect is to watch one’s language
7. Listening is a great way to show respect.
8. Remember that showing respect often (if not always) entails some sort of sacrifice on your part.
9. Remember to be aware of respect people’s private space.
10. Do not assume that because you are comfortable with a gesture (hugging) that the other person is. Remember, if you are not sure to ask and not impose your will on others.
Barbara C. Unell and Jerry L. Wyckoff’s called 20 Teachable Virtues: Practical Ways to Pass on Lessons of Virtue and Character to Your Children.
I was talking with a friend of mine who recently converted to Catholicism and is studying all the aspects of the Catholic faith that he can. He had just finished reading some books on Catholic moral theology. This friend went onto explain to me that he thought the big difference between Catholic morality and Protestant morality was that Catholics desire to be moral people out of their friendship with God and Protestants feel that they have to be moral in order to earn God’s love. Another way of putting it is that Catholics strive to be the type of friend that God wants me to be verses trying to earn God’s friendship. To go one step forward we might say that as Catholics we call God “Father” and we our goal in life is to be sons and daughters that He will be proud of trusting always in his love instead of spending our life trying to earn God’s love.
I really did not start to make good friendships in my life until I was in high school and I soon discovered that I acted a certain way around them in order not to ruin that friendship. I am not talking about giving into peer pressure or anything like that but I tried to be a better person when I was around them. For example, I would share one friend’s secret with another for fear of losing that friend. My friendship then with someone else created a moral standard that I needed to live up so in this example I choose not to be a gossip.
With this insight in mind, I begin my Spiritual Ponderings focused on my topic for November and that being the idea of virtue. Virtue is all about how can we be the best person that we can be or maybe another way of putting it or another way of putting it how can I be the best friend of God that I can be.
As a guide for our trip through the land of virtues, I have been using Barbara Unell and Jerry Wyckoff’s book: 20 Teachable Virtues: Practical Ways to Pass on Lessons of Virtue and Character to Your Children. For previous virtues please check out www.mayjesuschristbepraised.com.
Loyalty will be the first virtue we look at this year. Here is Drs. Unel and Wyckoff’s definition of the virtue called “loyalty”:
Loyal: 1. Faithful to one’s allegiance, as to a sovereign, government, or state: a loyal subject. 2. Faithful to one’s oath, commitments, or obligations: to be loyal to a vow. 3. Faithful to any person or thing conceived of as deserving fidelity or imposing obligations: a loyal friend.
As I was typing the above definition, I began to think of “loyalty” as maybe the fundamental virtue of the Old Testament. God constantly chooses to enter into the lives of people with the hope of establishing relationship with them. This relationship with the divine being that is God, though creates a demand for fidelity and imposes obligations upon the people that He enters into any relationship with for example Abraham is called to trust God to the point of possibly sacrificing His son Isaac, Moses had to remain faithful to the Lord even despite failing ten times to convince Pharaoh to let the Israelites go, and the Israelites are often chastised for not remaining loyal to God despite all that He does for them. God is ultimately loyal to those who trust in him (and even those who don’t).
10 Steps to Help One Develop the Virtue of Loyalty.
1. First is that we should model loyalty and thus not run away from a relationship at the first sign of a problem.
2. We should model loyalty by remaining faithful to our commitments.
3. We should talk to people about team loyalty and how our actions can add esteem or disrespect for teams that we support.
4. We should talk to people about how to remember what others have done for us.
5. We should also look for ways to help people who have helped us in the past.
6. We should reinforce family commitment (this can be done by creating family duties).
7. Remember to praise acts that show loyalty
8. Remember to point out acts that don’t show loyalty for example gossip or breaking a promise.
9. Talk about some Characters in the Bible that were loyal to God
10. What are some movie, television, or literary characters who you think demonstrate loyalty and why?