Fr. Thomas M. Pastorius
January 11, 2015
Spiritual Ponderings
Spiritual Randomness

My Spiritual Ponderings this month will be another round of Spiritual Randomness which means I will have a different topic to ponder each week. Today, I would like to reflect Fr. Benedict Groeschel’s advice on how to avoid temptation from his book: Stumbling Blocks And Stepping Stones: Spiritual Answers to Psychological Questions. Quotes from his book will be in bold.

A helpful resolution is to remain calm and accept the fact that resisting temptation is bound to cause discomfort. Many succumb to temptation because they are not prepared to endure the discomfort of hours of anxiety that temptation may entail.

1. Get away from the situation involving the temptation. This is called “breaking the set” in psychological terms. Places, people, situations often “trigger” temptation. Insofar as it is possible, these occasions should be avoided. If you find yourself in such a situation, move away quickly. Sometimes the trigger has nothing to do directly with the temptation. For some, anxiety and fatigue can be the most dangerous situations.

What are the things that cause you to sin? If you remove one or two of those things the chances of you committing the same over again diminishes greatly. For example a person struggling with internet pornography can bring his or her computer out into a public location, put on accountability software, etc. and this will greatly aid them in overcoming this habitual sin. Sometimes adding something to the set pattern can help. For example when someone is feeling tempted to look at pornography they can go for a walk or pray the rosary (or both). By adding time and distance they can help short circuit the sin.

2. Relax. Temptations are highly charged with anxiety. Reducing anxiety will usually reduce temptation. Anyone being tempted should avoid “hassles,” even if they appear to have little to do with the temptation itself. The famous slogans of Alcoholics Anonymous, “Let go and let God” and “Easy does it,” both reflect the fact that temptations to compulsive sin are related to high levels of anxiety.

I have discovered that a lot of my sins come as a result of me being stress and thus not thinking right. By taking the time to relax and in a special way remind myself of God’s love for me I can put an end to a lot of patterns that could end in sin before they go that far.

3. Spend time in prayer. Meditation that is quiet and trusting is most helpful. This may not be easy but it should be done as well as possible. If you are too distracted to pray from your heart, use some formal prayer, but make it brief.

I cannot stress this one enough. When I pray, I avoid sin. When I don’t pray I swim in it. In my prayer it is important that I am real and that I am honest with God about what I am feeling and thinking. If I am mad at Him then I need to express it to Him in prayer. If I am feeling hurt, then I need to let Him know that as well.

4. Finally, stand back and evaluate the whole situation. Anyone who is tempted often should step back and, with the help of spiritual friend, ask what may be done to reorganize his way of life to deal more successfully with this difficulty. There may be a need for counseling or spiritual direction.

Many of our sins make no sense after we have committed them. Why have I just looked at pornography when I know it hurts the ones I love by making it easier for me to objectify them or others? Why did I just get angry with that person who has done so much for me? Remember that the seven deadly sins distort our reality for example envy distorts our reality to make us think that we are in competition with others for God’s love when in reality God loves all His children equally.

5. Someone struggling with a compulsive problem may realize the need for a supportive group like AA or Courage. Another may recognize that his situation or jobs need to be changed radically to improve the spiritual quality of life.

True strength comes from knowing when to admit that we need help. It is actually a greater sign of weakness to refuse to get help and to continue to hurt your love ones and you are fooling no one while trying to act so brave because you refusal to get help shows that you are a coward.

Overcoming temptation often means taking legitimate care of oneself.